Citizen Advocacy of Atlanta & DeKalb, Inc.

     In 1975 Bill Gates coined the name “Micro-soft”; Mitchell, Haldeman, and Ehrlichman were convicted of the Watergate cover-up; the fall of Saigon ended the Vietnam War;  Ali defeated Frazier in the “Thrilla in Manila”; the first episode of Saturday Night Live aired; and in  Atlanta, Tim and Mary Yoder were falling in love with a beautiful little girl named Denise.

     Even before Mary and Tim became citizen advocates in 1975, they had set out to prove that the world was not going to limit Denise. Mary first laid eyes on Denise in 1970 when Denise was only five years old and living at the Georgia Retardation   Center.  

     Mary visited Denise often but recalls one particular Christmas going to Denise’s cottage to find that she was the only child out of sixty who had no family to visit for the holiday.

     By 1975 Denise was visiting Mary and Tim two weekends a month at their home. They would do what Mary called “family stuff”: housework, playing outdoors, grocery shopping, and cooking. In 1977 Mary and Tim moved into a new home where Denise had her own bedroom to stay in when she visited.  It was during these weekend visits that Denise made friends and learned to ride a bike.

     They attempted to bring Denise home to live with them but the state of Georgia did not permit interracial foster parenting. So, Mary and Tim became involved in identifying a suitable foster home for Denise.

     Through the years Mary and Tim advocated vigorously for Denise, but they were always aware that she just wanted to have a real home where she could be with the people she loves and who love her.

     In 1986 Mary and Tim finally welcomed Denise home to her own apartment upstairs in their house.  The next year Denise landed a real job where she has worked faithfully until this day. The three now share their lives as a family.

     Denise values her independence and celebrates her accomplishments but says that, “If Mary and Tim were not here to help me my life would be a living hell. I would be lonely or get into trouble. I would probably be dead.” Mary says, “She gave me someone to nurture and now that she is older I would be missing my best friend and Tim would not have anybody to tease.”

     There is an adage that says, “You can choose your friends, but you can’t choose your family.” This relationship proves that adage wrong.  Denise, Mary and Tim have chosen to become both family and friends. Mary comments, “When we met we were not sure how long our relationship would last, but we made a commitment to see where   it would go, and here we are over thirty years later.”